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A Hilarious Spoiler-Filled Recap of “Annabelle Comes Home”
Act I: The Setup
Ed: Fair wife, what dost thou think of this cursed doll?
Lorraine: ‘Tis but a trinket, dear Ed, yet it harbors darkness!
Ed: Aye, we shall secure it in our sacred artifact room, lest it wreak havoc upon the land!
Lorraine: Let us bless it with holy water! For what folly would it be to leave it unchecked?
Act II: The Unraveling
Judy: What a bore it is to stay home whilst Mother and Father battle demons!
Friend 1: Fear not, for we shall have a night of mirth and merriment!
Friend 2: And what of that cursed doll? Shall we not dare to speak its name?
Judy: Oh, come now! What harm can a mere doll do?
Annabelle: (whispers from the glass) Just wait until night falls, my little mortals…
Act III: The Chaos Unleashed
Lorraine: Hark! I sense a disturbance!
Ed: Indeed! The spirits trapped in the room are stirring!
Annabelle: (laughs maniacally) Time for some fun!
Friend 1: What sorcery is this? The lights flicker!
Friend 2: I think I prefer the haunted house rides at the fair!
Annabelle: (to Judy) You look like a tasty morsel!
Judy: (screams) Run for your lives!
Act IV: The Final Confrontation
Ed: We must return, my love! Our daughter is in peril!
Lorraine: Quickly! To the artifact room!
Annabelle: (mockingly) Oh, how sweet! A family reunion!
Judy: You shall not have me, foul doll!
Ed: (throws holy water) Back, you fiend!
Lorraine: We banish thee to the depths of hell!
Act V: The Aftermath
Judy: Is it over?
Ed: For now, dear child, but beware!
Lorraine: Annabelle sleeps, but she is never truly gone.
Annabelle: (from the shadows) You’ll see me again…
The End?
Chorus: Thus concludes our tale of terror. Beware the dolls that smile, for they may harbor secrets that would make even the bravest tremble!
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